Sometimes, but JUST sometimes, I wish I was a "self proclaimed" asshole. Sadly, I am not ...
When I have tried to be "nice" bad, really horrible things happen to me and to those I love. So to the world at large I say..... I'm an Asshole! WIPE ME you MF'ers.
Now that that is out of the way, let me get down to the "bidness" of all the glory here at Rancho.
I briefly entertained the idea of selling and just getting the fuck out of Dodge. But then I thought... my work here isn't done.... but, poverty rears it's ugly head and I have to rethink my possibilities. I need to buy a cemetery plot here in the city of Rancho... and a sizable marker.
I have been thinking and debating on the epitaph for this "grave of all graves". My name will appear on the marker (that goes without saying) but the epitaph. I'm considering: Here the Asshole lies... face down so you can KISS MY ASS.
I might add that I have ABSOLUTELY no intention of this being my final resting place... nor do I intend to have one for many many years to come.
Your thoughts on raising money and epitaphs will be greatly appreciated.
Now then...here's a little something that one of my daughters in Chicagoland sent me....
WHAT I'M FEELING:
assholey, very, assholey today OVERHEARD AT RANCHO: Why are you still naked?
WHAT I'M EATING:
raw toast cause I'm too lazy to cook
WHAT I'M SMELLING:
A waifing of poop and perfume... we think mother is haunting us WHAT I'M LISTENING TO: the voices in my head in violent disagreement over who's turn it is to drive the car MY CURRENT AVOCATION:
ne'er-do-well-ery and nap-a-thon training
WHAT'S IN MY POCKET:
a pocket full 'o' dreams
WHAT I'M CONTEMPLATING:
Raising the Battle Flag on morons....and of course...Contractor's trash bags in lieu of bodybags WHAT I'M READING: Ms. Asshat goes to Washington by Kickmee Someass NEWEST HOBBY: learning to draw stick figure porn