There has been some changes here at Rancho... bad, very bad. People say "what don't kill your ass will make you stronger" and to that I say.... look at all the crazy bastards... I've joined the crowd. The crazy bastard crowd... I may need to re-title myself.
So, I'm still here at Rancho... floppin' around all crazy and wild eyed.
I got it into my head to write some personal e-mails to the folks that had commented a few months back. It didn't go very far. One sweet lady no longer lists her e-mail and just because I have it... well, I hate to impose on folks... especially with a truck load of horror and crazy. Like handing out horseshit and peanuts to the homeless. Most just didn't have an address available.
I really, really hate it when people elude to some "secret" and then just leave you wondering ... I think I became of one those people. I still can not revisit the details even in my head, so I will tell you as simply as possible.
You probably picked up that I was leading an "odd" life. 20 years ago I was as normal as the next person, then came a telephone call at 11pm one night. My oldest son, passenger in a company car, in a coma and not expected to live.
I kept him and cared for him for 20 years. I rescued him from being killed my medical teams three times.... we needed some medicine.... and they killed him. We knew they would, we stayed away from them for years and years... it was horrible.
To sort of wrap your mind around his condition, think of Stephen Hawking living in poverty.
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So........Cable One is hiding out from me. I've been trying to find an e-mail address for the thieving thugs.
My oldest daughter pays my cable....has for about a year now. It really sucks when you can't help yourself anymore... there should be a law against getting old.
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I was going to sell Rancho, I sure it would please the city to see the last of me..... but now I'm not sure I can leave this house. I "feels" like my son is still here.... I told you.... I joined the crazy crowd.
Only two seven foot snakes so far this year (in the house), both non-poisonous..... so far so good.
Every time I use the toilet and that damn Eugene starts his cat stare.... well... I hurry things along. He likes to look at the snakes once they get in the house.... he is such an asshole.
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All these changes to blogger I don't even know if I will be able to publish this... just in case, lets wrap this up in a nut shell...
1. I don't like change
2. Lost my son in a horrible way
3. Snakes still getting into the house
4. Went bat shit crazy, forgot to buy a return ticket
5. Cable One are thieves
Later... I'm thinking of getting dressed in July... this robe will probably have fallen off by then and "other" arrangements will have to be sought.... and maybe not........
Go ahead, tell me how disgusting this is and how I shouldn't be allowed to Bloggerfy anymore.
Oh no, I am so, so very sorry about your son. So sad. I was excited to see you had posted something and didn't expect this.
ReplyDeleteMy heart truly goes out to you. Big hugs.
BTW any place that has snakes like that should be moved far, far away from. Hell I would be gone if they were 7 inches long.
Sometimes venting in an email is a good thing. Putting the words in writing helps to lighten the load. My email address is definitely available.
Oh bloody hell. I too was pleased to see that you had posted but am so very sorry for all that you have been/are going through.
ReplyDeleteStay crazy, it dulls the edges
like lori, i was glad to see you'd posted, but saddened by your news, sugar. you have my heart and a (virtual) casserole on your table because that's what we do around here when there is sadness in a neighbor's house. write when you want and if you want, pal. we're all here for you. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss. I was afraid the reason we weren't hearing from you was something like this.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you should pack up and leave - at least on their account. stay and give 'em hell.
In any event, fuck 'em. do what you want to do and don't worry if they can't take a joke.
take care of yourself.
I was glad to see you posted an update on what you have been up to. Sorry to hear about your son and fuckin' cable. I have many horror stories about cable problems. Also, I don't think I would be able to put up with the snakes. You are braver than me. Take care...
ReplyDeleteWell the other people have said it, but I might as well say that I too was pleased to see your post and am sorry to hear your news.
ReplyDeleteI've been considering getting dressed in July too...
ReplyDeleteSo sorry about your boy. Lots of love to you.
I am so sorry. I thought that might be the case based on your last post but I figured you needed to be the one to say it. Especially sorry that your son died in such a terrible manner. Please be kind to yourself.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how you've kept all this inside yourself. Although, anyone who has read your Shit at and Hit story will glean a deeper understanding.
ReplyDeleteMake like an Orangutan, start throwing it back at them.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger... but it fucking hurts like hell when things try to kill you, even when they fail.
ReplyDeleteYou have my deepest sympathies; I'm glad you're back.
I hope you find your way back from crazy but you'll have a fan in me even if you don't.
Eloh, that is the saddest thing. I am so sorry that you have lost your boy.
ReplyDeleteI can do nothing but echo everyone else's comments: excited to see you were back and saddened by these terrible news. I know there is nothing I can say that will make it easier, but I want you to know you are in my thoughts and my heart.
ReplyDelete(I like snakes. Although the only ones I've met have been pets, don't know what I'd do if I bumped into a wild one...)
I am sorry for your loss and I am glad you have surfaced again.
ReplyDeleteI am sad about your loss. I would welcome an email from you - when you are ready.
ReplyDeleteLaurie
So sorry for your loss. I admire your loving loyalty to your son.
ReplyDeleteBut I really, really hate snakes.